I Know How Crop Circles Are Made

​

by: Gerald Schaefer

MUFON Wisconsin Member

Now that I have your attention, promise me you will read this entire blog so that I can present my case in its full glory of undeniable evidence. If you do that, I am certain you will agree with me and we can together finally put all of this hoopla to rest once and for all. You’ve probably heard about and maybe even researched crop circles yourself through such reliable sources as Google, Wikipedia, and YouTube. Heck even CNN ran a few stories back in their hay days in the mid 1980’s so I’m sure you probably already have some preconceived notion about them. Set ALL of that aside… Here IS THE
TRUTH!

But first we must set the table a little bit for those who haven’t developed their biases yet. Crop circles are large-scale patterns of flattened crops such as wheat, barley, or
corn. The designs can range from simple circles to intricate geometric shapes and even complex fractal pattern pictograms. While most crop circles are found in rural areas of
England, especially in counties like Wiltshire, similar formations have appeared in countries all over the globe, including the United States, Canada, and Australia.

The first written report of a crop circle was way back in 1678 known as the “Mowing Devil” of Hartfordshire in a 5 page woodcut depicting the phenomena. Reports continued through the decades, no centuries, of these puzzling formations to humanity. It is highly important to understand this history because when we connect ALL THE
DOTS through the ages of all the data, the answer becomes clear. The phenomena took off in the 1970’s and 80’s becoming more frequent and much more complex in
designs. Basic circular patterns morphed into spiral fractal patterns, digital representations of a portrait of a Gray alien. Some even had encoded digital mathematical relationships such as Pi and even mocked our Pioneer Message to show
us who THEY are!

Crop circle undeniable facts are numerous. These entire designs literally appear overnight, and not over a “build plan” of additive patterns over days. The always appear
exclusively in alfalfa, oats, wheat, and corn fields. The crop is always spun around in a counterclockwise orientation, with the individual plant shafts gently “pushed over” and
never broken as commonly attributed to hoaxsters with planks and ropes. Someone this stupid certainly doesn’t understand High School geometry to create perfect circles, angles, and fractal reduction patterns. Jeesch, gimme a break on that as an answer. They also appear the morning after evenings where there have been no meteorological phenomena such as rain, high winds, lightening, thunderstorms, dust cyclones, etc. they have, and often do appear the morning after a calm quiet night! Even if they did, can a lightening strike create a circle with the digital information of Pi in a perfect circle?

HA! Go back to your Guiness Stout if that’s your rationale! So you can throw out the weather as a cause for these ornate works of art!

Ok, ok so you are growing impatient and want to know the real cause of them now that I debunked the weather and humans as the root cause for these masterpieces. Let’s put
on our Sherlock Holmes thinking caps and list what we know:
- They only happen at night.                                
- Always in fields of a FOOD crop for animals /  

humans that grows above the ground (i.e. not

a potato field, not a cotton field, not a tree or

bamboo forest).                                             
- Always with the plant stalk gently pushed over

and not hard fractured by a clumsy clod with

a plank.                                                          
- Most occur in England’s wonderful farmland  

and in the breadbasket of countries like the

USA and Australia. There is never a            

  "crop circle” in the desert sands, a forest with

       trees knocked down, nor etched in the roadway

        of I-94 sixty miles west of Bismark in the middle

of nowhere.     

                                           
So here is my confession, I am a member of the group who creates these masterpieces. We do it because you HUMANS continue to harass us when we just want our place in
this circle of life on Planet Earth. We’ve been misunderstood, lumped in with other species who have ZERO connection to our species. Yes, we are nocturnal, and we do have big almond shaped black eyes and elongated faces, but we have existed on this earth for thousands of years. So when you stop securing your garbage can lids so we can get back to enjoying a scrap or two from yesterday’s barbeque, we’ll stop thrashing your crops.

- Pete the Possum

​

​

 

​         

​

Me                         Not Me